What To Do When You Feel Like A Fraud (Hint: Get Over It)
2019 has been a weird year. I haven't been hiking, climbing, camping, etc. nearly as much as I used to. I'm just here-- adulting proficiently, but not adventuring very much at all. Have you ever felt so grounded that you don't want to move, yet so restless that you can't stop thinking about moving?
It's natural to change and it's healthy to rest. But I started this project, Outdoorism, with so much passion, and lately I don't feel like I have the right to claim it anymore. If being outdoors isn't a main part of my everyday life right now, how can I possibly keep running this business?
The answer I'm finding? Get over it. I still love to do all things outdoors (It's still a part of my life in doses & I think about it every day). Life is just getting in the way of the lifestyle I want. Maybe that's just a part of growing up (though I suspect it doesn't have to be).
I also struggle with the idea of finding my "people". What a privilege it is to hike, camp, backpack, climb, etc. with adventure partners and kindred spirits. I've had a taste of what that's like, but I haven't ever really felt like I'm a part of a group where I naturally fit in-- whether it was because of being a POC, black, a woman or whatever it may be. But the takeaway from that for me is that Outdoorism is exactly what I should be doing. It was born out of my passion for being an outsider even more than was about being an outdoors-lover.
Alas, Outdoorism is here to stay. And I'm going to work on doing more of those things I love along the way... Thank you for being a part of the journey.